Death Row!

I think I love this tree because it was on “death row” for so long. When we first even considered buying this house we were sure that this tree had to go. It was with other trees that had overgrown and hidden the house. After all it was a funny looking thing it was too close to the house and hung over the porch and dropped twigs with every little breeze. It seemed to be stunted because of the other trees crowding it out. It looked like a pine tree but it’s limbs drooped down in a very unattractive way and left much to be desired. It was seemingly unworthy to be saved. The only thing that kept it from meeting it’s end that year was too many trees and not enough time. It would receive a stay of execution until the next spring.In my world, I have been there where this tree stood. If I tried to be saved by my merit, I lacked so much. I wasn’t as beautiful as some, as educated as some and it seemed that I was lost in the crowd. I am unworthy in so many ways. Why would the Lord care about me? Would I be as wise as Solomon or as brave as David? The answer would be no. The bible says: You saw me before I was born and scheduled each day of my life before I began to breathe. Every day was recorded in your book. Psalm 139:16 and The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me. Psalm 138:8a. Could it be that the creator of this earth would find me worthy to fulfill his purpose?Spring came and as we cleared the crowd of trees around this tree, it’s beauty began to shine out. We loved it’s drooping limbs, it’s green needles were beautiful and it even shaded the porch at different times of the day. This little tree was “saved”. Today, ten years later, this tree stands as a reminder that all of God’s creation has purpose. We might not feel that we have purpose because of what we lack or for what we have done in our life but we still have purpose! This little tree even has a name it is a Weeping Norwegian Pine and she still stands reaching skyward to the one who sees her purpose.
Posted by Jeanie at 5:27 PM

Shama

Last night we lost our friend! She was there through it all for the last ten years. When we were sad she slipped up a little closer and the sound of her breathing comforted us. When we needed a laugh she was there to cheer us. When we returned home she was in a habit of finding us a gift to present to us, it could be a sock, a toy or even a piece of paper that she proudly displayed. She loved to run from us when we pretended to try to get the gift away from her. She loved walks, laying in the sun and peanut butter but mostly she loved us. It was the unconditional kind that says "It doesn't matter that you don't look so good today or I'll gladly put up with your bad mood." We already miss her but we celebrate her life and what it meant to us.

This is Shama our 13 year old boxer. She has been a good friend and a blessing from God. Shama is a biblical name that means "to hear or obey". We got Shama because ironically she failed to hear or obey. She was a runner and, when given a chance, she would run like the wind and would only come home when she was ready. Her first owners who live in the northern part of the state, kept her until she was 3 years old and gave her to someone who lived near us. When this person got her home she ran off and was on the run for 6 weeks. The dog catcher was called but this little girl could out run them all. They even shot her with tranquilizer guns but could not stop her. When we seen her the first time she was thin, elusive and very fast. She was very wary of people but succumbed to the chicken that my kids put out for her, since she was near starvation. Once we got her in the house we checked her tags and called people only to find out that no one wanted her. Since we already had a dog we continued to look for a new home for her. Finally we took her to the animal shelter and asked them not to put her to sleep but try to find a home for her. All of us were heart broken for this dog who we only had for a short time so after a long weekend with her in the pound we went back to get her and brought her home. At that time we knew that she would be ours but how would we keep her from running? We had her for several months and could not keep her from running away when she got a chance but she always came home. In the mean time we found a house in the country and moved. This girl found herself in the country with all the space in the world to run but when she was given this freedom she didn't want to run anymore. She loved taking long walks and running with the other dogs but seldom left the yard without us with her. She was home and she would spend many lazy days lying in the sun and enjoying life. Now these many years later, she has been such a blessing to us. She is such a unique old soul that I can only describe her as elegant and dignified. To me she is beautiful and was sent by God to us. Our Shama, the obedient one, we love you.

This is the Day!

This the Day

As I headed out of the door this morning I asked my dog Daisy if she wanted to go pray. Daisy not only wagged her tail she wagged her whole body because she knew what that meant. Well….. Not exactly what that meant, to her, the other two dogs and the two cats it meant yeh we are going out in the grass to sit next to her while she does whatever she does. I usually take my coffee, my bible and my burdens out to a favorite chair that I sit in that I call my PRAYER chair. It’s a place where I can raise my hands in praise to him or shout what burdens my heart that particular day. Through these years it has been a special place where the Lord and I could meet. During the winter I long for that place but settle for my “inside” prayer chair.
Today as I sat listening to the wind blow and watched the patient crew that followed me out side, I became aware of two birds flitting around in the trees in front of me. If birds could smile I know they probably were smiling. I don’t think I heard one complaint about how bad the winter had been or that they barely made it through because of the short supply of food. They weren’t discussing those crazy kids of theirs that flew the nest way before they were ready, or their husbands who didn’t clean the nest the way they thought it should be. No, they were in the moment! The breeze was warm, the food supply was overflowing and I even heard talk of how slow the worms were today. I thought about that and how good it would be to be a carefree bird in the trees. Then I thought about how God had not made me a bird, but he made me like himself. He gave me a memory of hard times that he had gotten me through and good times that I will always cherish . He wanted me to learn from my past but also to make everyday a new day the same way the birds of the air do. He wanted me to know “want” and “plenty” and to make me content in whatever state I am in. He gave me His heart but he gave me a free will. He gave me His Son! He tells me in His word that even a sparrow does not fall that he doesn’t know about it and also tells me how much more important I am that this sparrow. Great is my God!
As me and the crew of critters headed for the house I was so grateful that I could know the heart of God, but as the birds this morning sing, I sing “ This is the day the Lord has made, let me rejoice and be glad in it!”

Sleepless!

Have you ever composed a letter or email while you are supposed to be sleeping? I go to bed tired and ready to sleep only to have my eyes pop open and my mind kicks into high gear. Forget counting sheep, I try to fix things in my mind as I lay there in the dark. I often rehearse speeches that I need to give someone, or compose a letter, or email that I think needs to be sent to "straighten" someone out. I can say anything in my letter or email, I can tell someone how they hurt me or disappointed me, or how I think they should handle a situation. I do this a lot when I have talked with someone and said afterward "Boy I should have said this or said that. If I could do that again I would tell them a thing or two“. There are many times that I know I should have said something wonderful to someone or shown my appreciation more or let them know how much I love them. I write those kinds of letters too but those kind of letters usually bring me peace instead of tossing and turning because my mind is thinking good thoughts. I know that I should write more thank you notes not only to those people but to the Lord for his patience with me. I love the bible verse in Philipians that says "Finally brothers whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right , whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable, if anything is excellent or praiseworthy think about such things. Phil 4:8-9. This reminds me that before I write those letters I ask God if what I am wanting to tell someone is true, noble, right, lovely, admirable, excellent or praiseworthy. Is it kind? Many sleepless nights could have been peaceful nights if I filtered my thoughts through this glorious truth. Lord, help me to use Phil 4:8-9 as a model of how to think, even in the middle of the night. Night all! I hope I don't start blogging in the middle of the night!

Worthy?

I think I love this tree because it was on “death row” for so long. When we first even considered buying this house we were sure that this tree had to go. It was with other trees that had overgrown and hidden the house. After all it was a funny looking thing it was too close to the house and hung over the porch and dropped twigs with every little breeze. It seemed to be stunted because of the other trees crowding it out. It looked like a pine tree but it’s limbs drooped down in a very unattractive way and left much to be desired. It was seemingly unworthy to be saved. The only thing that kept it from meeting it’s end that year was too many trees and not enough time. It would receive a stay of execution until the next spring.
In my world, I have been there where this tree stood. If I tried to be saved by my merit, I lacked so much. I wasn’t as beautiful as some, as educated as some and it seemed that I was lost in the crowd. I am unworthy in so many ways. Why would the Lord care about me? Would I be as wise as Solomon or as brave as David? The answer would be no. The bible says: You saw me before I was born and scheduled each day of my life before I began to breathe. Every day was recorded in your book. Psalm 139:16 and The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me. Psalm 138:8a. Could it be that the creator of this earth would find me worthy to fulfill his purpose?
Spring came and as we cleared the crowd of trees around this tree, it’s beauty began to shine out. We loved it’s drooping limbs, it’s green needles were beautiful and it even shaded the porch at different times of the day. This little tree was “saved”. Today, ten years later, this tree stands as a reminder that all of God’s creation has purpose. We might not feel that we have purpose because of what we lack or for what we have done in our life but we still have purpose! This little tree even has a name it is a Weeping Norwegian Pine and she still stands reaching skyward to the one who sees her purpose.

He Knows Me Yet He Loves Me!

I have had the blessed pleasure and privilege of seeing the birth of some of my grandchildren. Some I didn’t see but waited anxiously outside the door to be presented with this new life. What a wonderful experience that was. I recently had the great pleasure of watching my granddaughter Jenna come into the world. We already knew that a girl was on the way because of the new technology but the mystery was still there. Who knew her hair would be red and that she would have her Mom’s lips. Who knew she would look like her Dad in so many ways. I couldn’t have predicted her sweet personality or her, at times, temper! I also let myself think of the unseen person in the room at those wonderful occasions. The creator of this little soul wasn’t surprised at anything. He didn’t look over my shoulder and say oh my, I didn’t know that! That’s a surprise to me! Or in another delivery room he wasn’t surprised when a child was born without arms or blind he didn’t say “now I will have to go to plan B”. As a society we have discovered DNA but he was the creator of DNA. When I was born he wasn’t surprised that I would have challenges. He knew me before I was ever to be. He knew what life would be for me. He knew the hurts, I would face, he knew the blessing I would have. He knew that sometimes my world wouldn’t make sense and it would be colored by depression at times. Thankfully he didn’t throw his hands in the air and decide that I wasn’t what he had in mind. Instead he declared “For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11. Praise the Lord, He knows me.
“JESUS KNOWS ME THIS I LOVE!!

Finished

In my journal, there is a place that asks what is the weather? I like to fill that in because it is fun to look back to see what the weather was on a particular day. Today I wrote: Cloudy, rained last night supposed to rain later today. Pretty cut and dry huh? But I began to think about how that reflected my mood and perspective for today. Bad and more bad coming. I forgot to include the fact that for right now the rain had stopped, the breeze was warm, the grass glistened from the rain and tiny droplets hung beautifully from the needles on the pine tree outside my window. How often I stand between these two realities but fail to really live and serve there. Sometimes I hurt from the past and dread the future. I am glad that Jesus did not fail to live in that "in between", he didn't stop doing good, preaching love and healing. When he was twelve years old, the bible says that he told his parents that he was "going about his Father's business" and at the end of his life he said it was "Finished". I hope to not only see the rain in the past but also the sunshine and may also look forward to my glorious home in heaven. But I pray I will really live and be about my Father's business until the Lord says It is finished!
draft

Jeanie

Big Lap

Today I trudged out to my prayer chair even though it was wet because of the rain the night before. I positioned my coffee, my bible, my journal and was ready for my devotions. I held my coffee in one hand my books on my lap and a pen handy so I could write my thoughts. Before long Lucy climbed up on my lap and tried to slip between my books and my body, making paw prints on me, my books and my bible. I adjusted all these things and finally gave up my coffee to hold my books and Lucy. It wasn't long before two cats joined Lucy and that meant that something had to go. Oh, how sweet they were, all trying to get my time and attention. I love each one of them including Daisy who lays at my feet groaning every so often. How could I decide who to get rid of? After all hadn't I come out there to be with God? I had even thanked God for these same lap invaders just a few minutes before they came. I tried to juggle everything, holding my bible up over their heads. I tried to write with my journal placed on their backs but they didn't hold still. My thoughts had been taken over by my precious friends. Finally I decided that my time with God was too valuble to spend it trying to fit him in so we adjusted things. My lap was off limits for the time being so Lucy found her place beside me. The cats grew tired of the constant maneuvering so they were content sitting on the table beside me. I again could focus on God and what he had for me today. I find myself so occupied with my surroundings, my problems, my hurts and conflicts that my lap isn't big enough for God. I sit, holding my pain, instead of setting it aside to let God come closer. While I try to concentrate on his truths other things crowd in, even good things. Lord, I clear my heart, life and lap to let you come and sit with me.

Over three years ago, I posted this, one of my first writings.  From that day on, the Lord brought so many things to my mind that I would scrawl out and eventually post on my blog.  But lately, it seems, I have to strain to even write a word.  I have gone through "writers block" before but I have felt utterly dry in my spirit for the last few months.  I have at times written three post a week but it is very hard to squeeze just one out a week as of late. 

I love writing!  I love telling what the Lord is doing in my life as well as others but I seemed to just run out of "me"!  I have asked for forgiveness if I have been prideful or offensive in any way but found no relief.  I have asked God why, when I had more "reads" than ever would He stop the flow of my words?  Not only was I not able to write but my eyesight has declined and my ability to focus on what I am reading has diminished. 

As I went to my journal today, I came across a scripture that I had written there.  Phil 1:6.

Being confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Jesus Christ.  Phil 1:6

I rejoiced over His words to me today!  No matter in what manner I will serve Him, He has promised to see me through.  I don't know if it is writing this blog or maybe something else but He will be with me forever.  Amen