Waiting For A Gulley Washer!

This morning at 4:00 am I was awakened with thoughts of a man from the first century BC named Honi! I have been reading “The Circle Maker” by Mark Batterson who starts the book out with a story told about this dude named Honi. Legend has it, that Honi lived in the generation before Christ that was threatened to be wiped out by draught. Miracles from God were only in distant memories and many people of that time had even stopped praying. But Honi believed that though God was not answering, He was still listening. A side note here, do we stop praying when we don’t get the answers we want? Anyway, the people asked Honi to pray for rain since he seemed to be the only one on speaking terms with God. Honi started by making a big circle in the sand and sat down. He promised to sit there until God sent rain to His people. The people stood around Honi, who sat in the middle of the twelve foot circle, waiting for something to happen. As Honi prayed, raindrops began to fall. The people began to celebrate but Honi was not done. He prayed for a hard rain, which followed and then finally a gully washer as we might say here in Illinois. Honi didn’t pray little prayers for a little god, he prayed bold prayers for a big God and it is said, God replenished the earth with raindrops the size of eggs.

Thinking of Honi and his bold prayers made me think about my prayer life. Do I pray bold prayers? Do I pray for a “sprinkle” when God wants to give me a “gulley washer”? So many times I timidly ask God for something only to apologize for it. “God, please give me this or that but only if you want, and God I am pretty sure you don’t want so I am ready for you to deny my request, amen”. Is this familiar to anyone other than me? I draw little circles for little prayers, that I could probably accomplish on my own if God doesn’t come through. Batterson says this is an insult to God! We need to pray God sized prayers! Prayers that are impossible without divine intervention. Do you have those kinds of needs? I know I do!

The bible tells us that we do not have because we do not ask, and “all things are possible…”! And is ANYTHING too hard for God? Was Honi on to something here?

Today in the wee hours, Honi, the sage of the first century BC, taught me to stay on my knees until I receive a “gulley washer”!

　

Where Can I Go?



You know what I like about exercising? ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! Well except when I am through and the satisfaction of doing it sinks into my weary body. We have been going to the YMCA three times a week to ride bikes, lift weights and for me I like to walk in the water which is very relaxing. That would be the only thing that I like about my workout! Then it’s home for a nap. Whew! Wears me out thinking about it!
  I have also been going to Weight Watchers to lose some of that Christmas weight, actually several Christmas‘s have ganged up on me. Every week I am tempted to buy a new cook book, a special measuring cup set with the WW logo or a WW water bottle. The last time I went I was intrigued by another little gadget that you can get to help with your weight loss. You put it around your neck and someway magically it knows whether you are up and about, exercising or vegetating on the couch. I imagined it sort of like the GPS, but instead of a car moving on the screen there would be a mildly, obese, gray haired woman wobbling along. If you plug it into your computer, it gives you a read out and tells you if you can lose weight doing what you are doing. WW water bottle, yes! This little “tattle tale”, no!

Today as I read Psalm 139 and thought of this little gadget. It tells me that God is interested in what I am doing, where I go and what I say. Just think of it, He not only knew us before we were conceived but knows our every move, even right this minute.

O Lord, you have searched me and you know me.

You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar.

You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways.

Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O Lord.

You hem me in-behind and before; you have laid your hand upon me.

Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain.

Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence?

Psalm 139:1-7

Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can we flee from your presence, Lord? Why would I want to flee from He who knows me so intimately! What love He has for us!

　

"You Are Mine"!

Lift your eyes and look to the heavens: Who created all these? He who brings out the starry host one by one, and calls them each by name. Because of his great power and mighty strength, not one of them is missing. Isaiah 40:26

My two favorite Christmas gifts, I love and use every day! One gift is a pink and white pen from my granddaughter Riley that says “I (heart) love Grandma” and the other is from my grandson, Caleb that says “Grandmothers are just antique little girls”. This morning as I read the bible and studied my lessons in James, I wrote with my beautiful pen and drank coffee from my special cup. I love these two items not only because they are from my grandchildren and they picked them out especially for me, but because they have my name on them “Grandma”!

We all love to be called by our name, don’t we? If mail comes to “resident” instead of our name I usually pitch it. Any good salesman knows it is wise to find out and call you by name because there is something about being called by our name that bonds us even to a stranger. Hallmark Cards make special cards for mothers, grandmothers, daughters and wives. Somehow I feel more honored by a card that has my name or title on it. All in all we like it when we are called by our name and recognized for who we are.

Scripture tells us that God knows us each by name! Not only does He know our name, unlike the salesman, He knows who we are inside and out.

You know when I sit and when I rise;

you perceive my thoughts from afar.

You discern my going out and my lying down;

you are familiar with all my ways. Psalm 139:2,3

He calls us by our name:

But now, this is what the LORD says--he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you, O Israel: "Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. Isaiah 43:1

Whenever I might feel small or insignificant I can look to God’s word and know that the Creator calls me by name. And He says I not only know your name “You are Mine!”

　

　

Cheese and Cracker Anyone?

 

 

I remember a story I heard a long time ago about a couple that planned a cruise. After paying more than they expected for the cruise they decided that they had to be very frugal on the trip. They would spend the bare minimum on everything. The “Mrs” packed one whole suitcase full of crackers and cheese which they planned to eat to save money on expenses. When they got on board, they were greeted by a waiter who asked where they would be dining that evening. The couple sheepishly told him they hadn’t made up their mind yet but both knew their destination. They had planned to make a meal of the cheese and crackers they had brought from home.

As planned, they dined on the crackers and cheese until they thought they could not eat another bite while they watched others on the ship eat delicacies they could only dream of eating. Mouth watering food, flashy drinks and decadent deserts were everywhere. The couple wondered how so many people could afford such extravagance but each night they trudge up to their cabin for a few crackers and some cheese.

The cruise was finally over and frankly the couple, being tired of cheese and crackers was ready. As they left the ship the Captain asked them how they enjoyed the food. “We couldn’t afford the food” the man finally blurted out, “we brought our own food!” The Captain, puzzled, said, “Didn’t anyone tell you that the food was included in the price. Everything was there for the asking!”

I wondered what I have forfeited because I did not ask God. Peace, maybe was included in the price Jesus paid on the cross but how many times do I fail to give my worries to Him to gain that coveted peace.

Last night was one of those nights that sleep would not come because of worry. I tried to pray but nothing relieved the anxiety that I felt for certain situations. I found myself munching on the cheese and crackers of worry instead of the banquet of peace that was included in the price already paid for me.

This morning I read a familiar verse from Matthew that says simply to come to Him and He will give me rest. I will again place my burdens on His strong shoulders because He asks me to. He was strong enough to carry the cross to Calvary, He is strong enough to carry my burdens too! He already paid the price, enjoy the banquet!

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.

Matthew 11:28

　

　

　

　

"May I Have This Dance?"

 

 

If my dream would come true I would be a dancer! Can you believe it? Me neither. I remember trying to dance as a teenager , but just couldn’t catch on. I struggled with two left feet when it came to the two step or any of the dances of my time except maybe “the twist” which was merely twisting your body to the beat of the Chubby Checker record. “The Stroll” was big back then and I loved the familiar beat and could do it okay until it was my turn to stroll down the center of other dancers, at which time my “Stroll” turned into a “Stumble”. The truth was, chewing gum and strolling was too hard for me. But in my dreams, this girl, who could trip over a blade of grass, is a ballerina! I sway to the beat at any kind of music in which dancers trip along so gracefully. I can hardly sit still when ice skaters glide so effortlessly on the ice. I love it! I guess that is why this little phrase caught my attention this morning.

“How sad to admit that, sometimes when God extends his hand to invite me onto the dance floor of life, my dance card is already full.”

How many times do we miss being close to God because we are too busy doing stuff….even God stuff? How often do we miss the peace of gliding through life with Him because our two left feet are running trying to keep up with the hectic lifestyle that we have created. A life of busyness. Oh, you don’t need to recite the good that you do, I know all about it, I have been there. We live in a fast pace world that hardly gives us a moment to hear the music, let alone dance. Unfortunately when we lay our heads on the pillow we may find ourselves wishing for more, not more things to do but just MORE! That more we long for is a closer walk with God. Too many times we say “I’ll do better tomorrow”, “When I get this next project done I can pursue God more” or “Sorry, God my dance card is already full”!

 

I love this scripture from Acts in the bible.  Listen carefully to the words as you read them can't you almost hear God saying, "May I have this dance?"

'For in him we live and move and have our being. Acts 17:28 NIV

Mad At God? Consider It Pure Joy!

 His ways are higher than our ways and His thoughts higher than our thoughts,

(Isaiah 55:9 NIV).

　

I was mad at God, not that my Dad had died but the way he had died. I had been working as a Respiratory Therapist for two years a fact that my dad was very proud. In fact when he was so very sick and the ambulance driver told him that the other hospital would be closer he insisted that he come to “Jeanie’s hospital”. I was working that day and remember going down to the garage where the ambulances come in, not knowing what to expect when they opened those back doors to lift him out. As I had feared, Dad was in great respiratory distress but that didn’t stop that big smile from taking up his whole face. I knew he was relieved to see me as if I could magically take away the awful lung disease that had taken over his body.

Through Respiratory school and during my short years working I had encountered many people with COPD like my father. Many patients, time after time came to the hospital, as their health failed until they eventually ended up on a ventilator. I had cared for many who was so bad that a breathing machine had to breath for them to sustain their very life. Some would succumb as, not even the mechanical breathing could keep them alive. I saw terror and pain in their face as they gasped for life giving oxygen to fill their damaged lungs only to die in their efforts. At those times, I would pray “Lord, I know my Dad is so very sick and will die with this horrid lung disease but please don’t let him die like this, not like this Lord”.

So here I stood looking at my Dad, who had always been a strong man with wide shoulders and big hands, looking every bit like the many patients that I had taken care of in the past two years. He struggled to breathe, his color was ashen but still there was that smile. Oh my how I loved this man. I shot a quick prayer to God “Don’t let him die like I have seen so many die” I pleaded. “Don’t let him have to be on the ventilator”, I begged.

Days and weeks stretched on and indeed my dad was put on the ventilator as I had feared. He, as many, suffered and he, as the many that I had cared for, died. I painfully mourned my father’s passing as anyone would, but I mourned the trust in God that was so conspicuously missing in my life. The death I expected but God had let me down I thought. The one thing I had asked he had not given me. How could I trust him again?

In James I read a little verse that always confused me concerning the many trials we go through.

Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face many trials because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. James 1:2-4

In the weeks and months to come as I processed the anger I felt for God, my faith was being tested. But, I began to notice that I had more compassion for my patients, because they wore the face of my Dad. I felt when I lessened the pain of others it was like I was doing it for my dad. And when I was greeted with a smile of relief when I entered a room to bring a breathing treatment, I knew that my prayers went unanswered for a reason. In God’s timing, in the bigger picture, work was being done in my spiritual life. As I persevered to understand God, He made me more complete.

I worked for over twenty years caring for those who wore the face of my Dad and each one made me stronger in my faith. I can’t say I have gotten to the place where I consider trials pure joy but I have gotten to the place where I spend less time being mad at God and more time wondering where these trials will lead me in God’s bigger plan. I know that His thoughts are higher than mine because He is God and I am not!

 

God did not give me the answer just the way I asked but as I thought back to that time today I remembered that God in His Mercy, though my dad was on a ventilator, let him quietly and peaceably pass as he slept. He stepped out of his world of pain into the arms of Jesus!  Thank you Lord for your love!

　

Stones Thrown and "Old Dogs"!

The teachers of the law and the Pharisees brought in a woman caught in adultery. They made her stand before the group and said to Jesus, "Teacher, this woman was caught in the act of adultery. In the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. Now what do you say?"  They were using this question as a trap, in order to have a basis for accusing him. But Jesus bent down and started to write on the ground with his finger.  When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, "If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone at her."  Again he stooped down and wrote on the ground.  At this, those who heard began to go away one at a time, the older ones first, until only Jesus was left, with the woman still standing there.  Jesus straightened up and asked her, "Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?"  "No one, sir," she said. "Then neither do I condemn you," Jesus declared. "Go now and leave your life of sin."  John 8:3-11

　

Are you a “stone thrower” or do you stand waiting for the stones to tear into your frail frame? I found myself today in both places at the same time.

You see I awakened with the dreaded “Oh no, I blew it again” in my gut. Been there? I had hurled my opinion like I knew it all. As I hurled my stone of self-righteousness I wanted everyone to know my way was the only way. Unlike the Pharisees, I debated about something that was not even sin but just a difference of opinion. I thought, after all, my age and wisdom meant something, didn’t it? Was I not obligated to throw out my opinion, letting it hit whoever got in my way? Oh my, to say it was not pretty was an understatement!

On the other hand, this morning, I was like the woman who was “caught” in sin! The accuser the devil threatened to paralyze me with guilt and shame. I began to question if I could be forgiven for my actions even though I had asked. “Isn’t this just like you?” Satan hurled. “You have blown it again and forever this time!” he taunted. “You always do that, you will never change”, he accused! Satan’s stones tore at my flesh and wounded my heart.

As regret threatened to suck the joy right out of my soul, I heard the stone in my hand fall to the ground with a thud as he said “you without sin cast the first stone”. I no longer felt the ugliness of self-righteousness course through my veins but only the humbleness of knowing the Savior who loves me even though I am not perfect.

I felt not the stone of condemnation from the Lord but a grace flow over me. I heard the words “neither do I condemn you”. I knew that, even though some apologies were in order, the “accuser” was out of business and that this “old dog” could still learn from her mistakes. Praise God!

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.

1 Corinthians 13:4